God has a way of teaching me things that I've come to recognize as His style for me. He usually brings up something through what I've read or a conversation with someone that really sticks with me and changes my way of thinking in one way or another. Then later that day or the next day or even the day after that, something else that will reinforce that change of perspective will come across my path. The other night I was reading from the second military wife book Phil bought for me for Mother's day and this idea hit me hard.
"It's important to pay attention to your interests and passions whatever they are-- and find ways to fit them into this life. It's important to live from the place of your own authenticity and uniqueness rather then trying to fit yourself into some mold that isn't you."
Wham! Right upside my head was the realization that yet again I have fallen into the trap of being miserable because I am not this way or that, failing to some silly expectation or idea that I've gotten into my head that God never put there. Just as I'm started to let this idea change my mind...
Tonight I decided to work on clearing up the HUGE pile of things in our dressing room that has been there since we had the floors redone. This was super helpful since I found our car registration renewal that is due tomorrow! I digress. I was sorting through huge piles of papers and found a scratch paper I have written two quotes on from some book I read at some point. I often make this mistake. I read a book, find a sentence or two I like, I write them down and find them later only to have no idea where these came from! So from some mystery book I have read in the past comes the quote that I think I should write on my mirror to read every morning before I start my day.
"Your job is the relentless pursuit of who God has made you to be. Anything else you do is sin and you need to repent of it."
Could that be any more straight forward?? Oh the things I have pursued that have nothing to do with what God has made me to be or what He wants me to be doing!
So there is the idea God has been working on in my heart lately. Cutting myself some slack when I think I'm not measuring up to whatever standard I have gotten into my head and focus on following after this mysterious trail God has been leading me down for years and years that I have not even begun to understand!