It's funny this time that we're in. Not funny ha-ha... funny in that there's really no other way to describe it. We saw Phillipp off and are now operating as a family from two different parts of the country. Later there will be many more then the thousand miles that stand between us now. We're all busy with our own tasks. Phil is learning so much every day- things he'll need to know for his new job. I'm doing my best to organize a smooth move for our belongings and the three of us. The boys are busy doing something we've never asked of them before. We're asking them to be okay with us uprooting everything they have come to know and be comfortable with and transplant into a new place. The problem is they don't really know or understand that this is what we're asking of them. In their eyes all of this must seem so much bigger then it is even to me. Daddy is gone to some mysterious place (and taken their favorite car with him as well). Mommy is taking everything down off the walls and talking about people coming to pack up everything else into boxes. We have suitcases out now that we are putting all our pants and long sleeve shirts in. Nana will be coming soon. They have no control over any of this and very little understanding about it all. Josh was only 1 1/2 when we moved in here so this is a new experience for both of them.
I claim no special wisdom in the area of being a military wife. I've made so many mistakes doing it along the way. (Just so you know, wearing flip flops and a tank top on a Navy ship is sometimes frowned upon.) This is the most demanding thing the Navy has ever asked me to do. Even as I type that, I know it's not true. This is the most demanding thing God has ever asked me to do. It has become abundantly clear to us that He is actually the one in control of all of this. Fortunately, this good and gracious God that we serve has put many brothers and sisters around us, even though we have no family near, to help me do what I need to do and stay sane all at the same time- something I thought to be an impossible task.
So, all that being said, we are doing great! The boys are actually excited to be taking the trip and Josh is actually looking forward to them coming to pack up everything. He is coming up with some of the funniest stuff I've ever heard him say; Jeremiah has learned 3 new words in the last 3 days. Everything is coming together in good time for the move in spite of learning this morning that they're going to start a day earlier then expected.
I am... well, I'm trusting. Every now and then a random moment will hit where the sadness of Phil being gone or the stress of the move and road trip feels overwhelming, but God has always made His strength known best in my weakness. I've been doing everything I can to put the boys in control as much as possible. Yesterday we went around the house and the boys got to tell me what picture they wanted me to take down next. Josh is helping me pack his suitcase with socks, underwear, undershirts, pants and long sleeve shirts (he hasn't remembered he will need pajamas yet, so it'll be interesting to see if that hits him). I have been trying to make sure the boys still eat and sleep on their regular schedule.
Is this hard? Yes. Is it impossibly hard? That is probably best answered in another question: Is all of this bigger then God is able to control?
Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.
Matthew 6:34... The Message
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